How big is yours?

e·go  

n. pl. e·gos

1. The self, especially as distinct from the world and other selves.

2. In psychoanalysis, the division of the psyche that is conscious, most immediately controls thought and behavior, and is most in touch with external reality.

3.

a. An exaggerated sense of self-importance; conceit.

b. Appropriate pride in oneself; self-esteem.

I wrote a little about ego in my last entry.  It seems like I’m thinking about this a lot lately.  Our society sure does place a lot of importance on keeping self-esteem intact.  From the no score youth soccer to “whatever you dream, you can achieve” slogans, we really place a high priority on keeping people’s self worth as high as possible.  I can see the reason.  We don’t want a nation of quitters and pessimists, but boy are we creating a bunch of people who think they’re entitled.

Good example;   I’m writing this blog.  Somehow I’ve gotten it into my head that somebody cares about what I have to say, so I’ll just put it out there.  There was a time when anybody hoping for a platform from which to preach needed to be vetted by somebody.  They had editors.  They had to do research, go to school to learn how to put their words together, compete for the few jobs out there that would let them give their opinion.  Now, spew away, nothing to stop you.

The architecture world has always been a place of the pumped up ego.  Architecture school makes you this way.  Sometimes in school, it’s not the talent that wins, but the best arguer; the one who can post rationalize and vehemently defend.  This culture makes you puff up, develop callus exterior, and creates a group of people who need to be “right” no matter what.  I guess that gets you through school, but it’s not so great when you need to work in a team, whether on a project, or in a firm.  Maybe that’s why most people in the architecture field are sole practitioners.

So, what do you do when you need to work as a team, or to compromise, and you’re surrounded by big egos?  Two choices: 1) Stroke the Ego, make them think it was their idea, politic, cajole, and placate.  Get what you want without getting the credit.  Pick your battles.  Keep your ego small.  2) Fight.  Tell them what you think.  Take no prisoners.  I’m usually in the camp of the former, but it’s tiring.  I’m tired of massaging people, not making waves, maneuvering, and worrying about upsetting the wrong people.  Maybe I need to move on to number 2….-ds